Peaceful heart

Hebrews 4:12

For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.

How's this for a come back...

OK, OK. I'll come out and say it first.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for pushing you aside blogosphere--did you know blogosphere is a word that does not have one of those red-squiggly lines under it? Amazing.--Well, maybe I more have pushed you into a closet similar to the one in Matilda and fed you a light diet of Vonnegut quotes and bible verses through the cracks.

I promise I will be more attentive by Friday, well probably Saturday if we're being honest. Regardless there are reasons for my detachment, reasons that are in other words probably meaningless and too boring to go into, but I will give you a brief synopsis and maybe even some conclusions why I need to get my butt back in blogging gear.

I will give you a brief listed update about my life.

"Lists?" You may ask.

And I will answer, "Yes, lists."

And you will say,"why lists? They are so short, so unsentimental!"

And I will either answer--depending on my mood-- a longwinded answer, such as, "Yes. I know. But lists, are in fact, the only last remaining bridge in which I can communicate sensibly to the world outside my head, because school has in all ways minced and chopped my brain into a goo similar to blended peas. So if you beg me for some sentimental, nostalgic paragraphs on life, I apologize, I can not do that."

OR

because it is finals week and I do not have the energy nor the patience to deal with anything other than poetry, misogyny, advanced grammar and fiction I will simply state,

"Deal.

OR

I've done it because of this...

Regardless. Here is my list.

My Narcissistic List on My Life

1. I've been sick or something? Around 6 months ago I woke up and my right eye was swollen shut and oozing things that should never ooze out of your eye. Concerned, I went to the ER with Trevor, who in the round about way was questioned battery but after a few round about answers I was able to receive a prescription for eye drops. I went home to hot wash clothes and Advil, feeling confident in getting better. A week goes by with no improvement, actually it got worse, I slowly was developing hives all over my body that blossomed into lovely rashes, equivalent to poison oak. To make this short, I went to a series of doctors and specialists got a myriad of different pills, drops, sprays, creams and ointments yet, here I am, 6 months later, still oozing, still swollen, crusty, itchy and exhausted. I am now waiting for CT results and a blood test, hoping maybe there was a simple allergy that has been causing so much pain. Come Wednesday, I better have some answers.

2. Twenty-one. Well, life has been pretty uninteresting. Being sick or whatever it may be, makes life hit the breaks that doesnt mean time stops--Last week, I turned 21. I have never felt so loved since 5th west gave me a mock strip tease for my 19th birthday. My house mates made one of my favorite dinners (thanks Katie especially!), and we got to eat on the floor while lounging on pillows. It was truly an amazing evening. The week followed with going to bars and dancing, I have to say, I have gotten my fill of outings until next year.

3. Spring Break School is almost over. Thank the Lord. It's been a hard quarter, with another heavy course load. I can hardly wait to head back home for spring break and sunshine. The highlight of my trip back home? Getting to attend one of my best friend's, Katie Hahn, wedding showers. I can hardly wait.

4. Rough times behind. This quarter didn't bring the best of times, but I can't go on without acknowledging how thankful for the wonderful girls in my house, Trevor and all my dear friends that have surrounded me with their love and always have brought good times. And not to drench this with syrupy optimism, I have had some fantastic memories of Winter 2011 that include: movie nights, snow days, broadway plays, heart to heart talks, long walks, and the most amazing dinners. Not to mention I finally started Demon Souls.

5. Back to the Future.... As of now, I am looking forward to the future. There were plenty of opportunities I missed out on this last quarter, but while I may have lost out on fun times or extra money, I have been given in return a new direction to pursue. I could not be more excited for this and cannot wait to share in more detail later. Next quarter, summer and even fall bring whispers of new promises and new adventures, which of course, I am sure are combined with new heartache and new troubles; nonetheless, I can hardly wait. Thank you, God for the past tribulations you have walked me through--I never thought I would be saying this--but it makes sense now.

6. The Blues It makes me uncomfortable writing so much about myself so I'm going to stop now. I recently wrote an Essay about the History of Blues and Langston Hughes, titled "Hughes and Blues," maybe except an excerpt or two from it, there is an interesting development this specific type of music went through that I found to be absolutely fascinating.